Just Between Me, Myself and I...

Seems all I have is... me, myself and I
To learn again how... to trust, to love, to rely
Perhaps I'm paranoid you may say
But I'm only human this day

Is it me...
~ that is un-lovable?
~ that is difficult?
~ that is different?
~ that is impossible?
~ that is paranoid?

Around me...
~ people laugh
~ people smile
~ people find open arms
~ people cry on comforting shoulders

Then I look at me and find...
Just me...
Myself...
And I...

I ask God why...
~ to be included you must be needed?
~ must I carry on when it is easier to just give up?

I'm sorry, God, I am but human.
I fall, I bruise, I break, I hurt... I am foolish, I am weak... I fail over and over.
My thoughts run wild ~ Do You love me (even if no one does)? Why would You (when it seems no one can)?
But yet oh-so-silently...
~.~.~ "I do, My child... just because..." ~.~.~
Is it that simple? Can it be?

The Day It All Stood Still

Monday was definitely a day Malaysians living in the Klang Valley would remember for some time to come… I mean, how can one forget the “fun” (more like agony) of being “trapped” in your car for extended periods, moving only inches (if any)? What am I talking about? The horrendous standstill traffic due to the roadblocks, especially around the Parliament area in Kuala Lumpur!!

It was quite odd that traveling from Old Klang Road back to Subang Jaya via Federal Highway late on a Sunday night took us longer than usual, with the unexplainable masses of cars at such a time. We wondered why traffic was so heavy and congested… Little did I know, worse was ensued the next morning!

I left home at about 7am and headed to Petaling Jaya, where I worked. Thinking that it was just one of those days that Federal Highway was extremely congested (I mean, Monday morning ler… probably everyone got a bit of Monday blues and left a bit later than usual) as I was greeted by congestion even getting onto Federal Highway, I detoured through Glenmarie to use the NKVE Highway to get to work on time (I start at 7.30am). The journey on NKVE was pretty uneventful and upon exiting the Damansara toll, I had intended to take the flyover to Sprint Highway, which usually gets me to work quicker than if I had used the LDP Highway. Surprisingly that day, traffic was at a standstill on the flyover, which had backed up quite significantly – even getting onto the flyover was almost standstill! It was a good thing that I was not too blur that morning (c’mon, it’s Monday morning!!) and quickly detoured off to use LDP instead, taking heed of the traffic reports coming from the radio station. I finally arrived in the office – five minutes to 8AM!! Ugh… my punch card had a red timestamp… sigh. My boss came in later and I heard him informing our admin staff that, “everybody will be late today; traffic jam very bad”. A newspaper article was circulated to all the staff later that morning with the explanation of the horrific ordeal – roadblocks due to the possibility of illegal protests as Parliament would be presiding that day.

A reprise was seen just yesterday, as reported over the radio station’s traffic report. Not wanting to be caught in the traffic jam, I used the LDP instead as I could already see the long line of cars heading to Sprint Highway. At least this time I was only about 5 minutes late, compared to 25 minutes!!

And finally, I took a peek at the newspaper today and found this article:
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/7/18/nation/21857511&sec=nation
It was entitled, “Roadblocks to continue”… sigh! A colleague told me of her friend who actually took emergency leave on Monday and turned back home instead of enduring the traffic she saw as she was on her way to work in KL!! Sadly, I wouldn’t be able to afford such a “luxury”, hehe…

Medical Report ~ Ortho and Physio appointments

I've been having some back pains, especially my lower back, for some time now. Finally, one day after having unexplained backache, I decided to finally get it checked out. I figured, since I have medical coverage (at government clinics / hospitals only), I may as well make the best of it. Hence, I finally decided to make an appointment to see a specialist.

I tried to expedite the waiting time by going to a private GP to get a referral letter. Referral letter in hand, I was off to Selayang Hospital the very next day. However, all I got after a few hours of waiting was an appointment date, lolz~! The appointment was set to be one and a half months later!!

Finally, one and a half months passed, and the pain also subsided in time... Went to the hospital on 28th May 2008, directly to the Orthopedic Department, and took a number - #4; shouldn't be a long wait, according to the nurse at the counter. So, I settled down on a chair to wait my turn... I then noticed people getting up and crowded around something...

Tried to take some pictures using my phone ~ sorry about the blurry pics... phone is kinda old liao... Finally after the crowd cleared (about 10-15 minutes later), I managed to take a shot of what everyone was crowding around... It was a snack vendor - peddling snacks off a trolley!! Brilliant! Lolz...

After the vendor left, I was left to my own devices again... Phone + PDA = Devices to keep me entertained during the wait... *winks*

My supposedly "short" waiting time soon became one hour... then one and a half hours... Finally, after waiting for over 2 hours, I went to the counter to find out what was going on. It seems that the specialist I was supposed to see was on leave that day and his assisting nurse only found out about an hour ago... =S As a result, all the patients the specialist was supposed to see was distributed to the other medical officers that were working that day... Since I was "staff", I was given priority (they also kinda felt bad that they left me waiting clueless for so long kua...) to see the next medical officer that was available. I wondered whether or not I should've gone to check on the status earlier, hehe... *winks*

A couple of x-rays and a consult with the medical officer later, I was diagnosed with scoliosis and given a prescription, along with a referral for physiotherapy. The x-ray showed the lower back muscles in spasm, and the medical officer said that my backbone was too straight~!

Met an ex-colleague, who happened to be working at the satellite pharmacy, who filled my prescription - muscle relaxant and pain killers. The ironic thing was that my prescription was:
~ Myonal tid x2/52 (muscle relaxant, three times daily, for 3 weeks)
~ Tramadol prn (pain killer, when necessary)

What I got from the pharmacy: exactly 42 tablets of Myonal, but a box of 100's of pain killers... Wow, I didn't even know I was in that much pain, haha!! The ironic part, though, was I had back ache the day after the doctor's appointment, which I did not have on the day of the appointment... >.<

The physiotherapy appointment was scheduled 2 weeks later, so I found myself at the hospital again on 11th June 2008. Rushed to the hospital as I went to get some currency exchanged and picked up my bus ticket to Singapore before my physio appointment - will be off to Singapore that weekend. Was a bit late for my appointment. The nurses or attendants at the Physio department - not as friendly as the ones at Ortho... =(

When my turn finally came, I was left to stare at the wall for a while, waiting for the physioterrorist physiotherapist to come attend to me. When she finally came, *poke, poke* *poke* *OUCH!!* She hurt my shoulder~! Got a VERY painful massage and heat compression to relax the muscle... The heat compression helped the most, and after  about 10 minutes of heat therapy, the shoulder muscle relaxed and the pain subsided a bit. A little bit more massaging to relax the muscle and she then proceeded to teach me some back exercises. After learning a couple of back exercises, she led me to the "gym", where I was instructed to hang onto a ladder. The gravity pull can help to "straighten my back".

Things I learnt after the trip to the physioterrorist physiotherapist:
~ I can barely carry my own weight... and I'm supposed to be underweight some more... haha!
~ My case of scoliosis is quite mild, as the main problem is that my left and right sides are not even (one side is slightly higher than the other)
~ Back exercises that I was taught is supposed to help my condition, and I'm to do them regularly, i.e. everyday
~ I can only get time-off from the physiotherapist... No MC... so it was back to office after lunch...

Well, next physio appointment one month after... scheduled for 16th July 2008... (this time appointment after lunch, so I can go straight home after, hehe...) More updates after that lar... Now, gotta go do back exercise before I forget (again~!)